Sometimes I wish I can save you.

There's just so many things that I want to tell you. Things that I wish you will understand. I wish you would know what the fuck you're doing sometimes. What do I have to do to make you understand? If you want me to speak in a different language I would spend days and nights to just learn that language so long as you understand. Is it so much to ask for? For you to be normal? For you to just love yourself? For you to just be you, like when you used to? You'll never know the pain I feel for you. Never. Every single day, I think of you. I think of ways to help you. I think of ways to get to know you better. I think of ways on how I can be closer to you. I said "you can't save everyone" once. I guess it's a harsh reality, but I refuse to believe so. I want to save you. I need to. I need to save you. Because no one else will. Only me. I need to save you. You'll hate what I'll do but you have to understand where I'm coming from. Just understand me for once. Give yourself a chance to save yourself. Stop wasting it all away. You have youth, you have health. Don't throw it all away. You know I love you. So so much. But how much do you love yourself? What is your self-worth?

Take a breath

I pull myself together

Just another step till I reach the door

You'll never know the way it tears me up inside to see you

I wish that I could tell you something

To take it all away

From Paris to Berlin.

Believe it or not, Jude and I CYCLED on a BICYCLE from Sengkang to East Coast Park! Sounds crazy but doing it wasn't that crazy. (: It was fun. My bum is kinda aching now. Jude's shoulder started to ache on our way back. Hopefully it gets better... I wonder how much weight I lost just by that. HAHA! I love days like that when Jude's my bestfriend. Part-time lover, full-time friend. (:

So many people gonna say that they want you,
To try to get you thinking they really care,
But there's nothing like the warmth of the one

who has put in the time

and you know she's gonna be there.

If I fell, would you say that I'm clumsy?

I'm tired. I'm going to sleep.

If I fell in love with you,

will you promise to be true

and help me understand.

'Cos I've been in love before,

and I felt that love was more

than just holding hands.

Flaws.

I'm feeling like shit now. It has just been made known to me that I am lacking the manners I used to have. Why is it so hard to appreciate someone when you actually want to and appreciates? The thing is I didn't so I'm not making any excuses. I know you're disappointed in me. I'm really disappointed in myself too. It's time for me to open my eyes wide to see how fucked up I'm becoming.

MUM'S DAY.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to my one and only MUMMY.

Although we might not see eye to eye sometimes, you'll always be my mother. And I love you just for being my mother, guiding me through these past 17 (soon to be 18) years. I love you very much mummy and I know you love Ricky and I very much too! (:

P.S. I know you loved the presents. (:

Child you don't know

You'll never know how far they'd go

To give you all their love can give

To see you through and God it's true

They'd die for you, if they must, to see you live

Pinkey Rainey.

Hello world! I would love to introduce you to my Pink Bike, Rainey!

Well it's pretty pink eh? It looks nothing like when my brother and I first found it all abandoned by the drain man. Thanks to Jude, this baby's looking like a solar flare! Hours of scrubbing and sanding and washing and spraying. And of course 70 bucks of my measly salary to pay for new tubes, new tires, new front brakes (the back one had worthless metal piece missing), and new bolts and nuts. All that really paid off.

It's named Rainey. After Jude's 3rd name ( 1st:Jude, 2nd:Brian, 3rd:Rainey) because without him, this bike would have still been scrap metal. (and I would still have to walk to his place and back.)

We still have a little bit more to do, but it's looking AWESOME so far! (:

You've got this silly way
of keeping me on the edge of my seat
But you're only counting the clock against the train
And I'm miserable

And you're just getting started.

This Is For Keeps.

I feel awful. Physically, mentally and emotionally.

Eternity will never be enough for me

and eternally we'll live our infallible love

Fuck what others think.

Why Won't You?

I feel pretty sad now. I have no idea what exactly I'm sad about. I guess everything that I used to not notice that made me sad is making me sad now. I don't make sense do I? Yeah. Sad. More like moody.

I NEED THAT ICE CREAM I'VE BEEN CRAVING FOR WEEKS. But I shan't.

Got work early tomorrow. Gonna hit the sack. Hopefully tomorrow I wake up a little happier.

But I believe in you so much
I could die for the words that you say
But i believe in you so much
I could die from the words that you say

Care.

"A person does not care how much you know about them until they know how much you care for them."

This is one line that was etched in my mind all-day today. I think it's very true.